This Christmas is Different!

 

Yesterday I had a CT and bone scan as something they do as a baseline and check if anything abnormal shows up that is unexpected.  But my scans came back all clear, aside from the cancer in my breast of course!  To start my day, the tech tried to insert the IV catheter into the vein in my left arm and apparently my vein did not want it there because it bent the catheter! So I got to get stuck in the other arm instead, fun fun fun. Before the CT scan, the tech prepped me on what I will feel when they inject me with the contrast.  He told me about the stinging pain, then metallic taste in my mouth, then sensation that I would have to pee. So, this all happened and I swore that I totally emptied my bladder all over myself on the table.  I thought this is going to be so embarrassing that I wasn't able to hold back the feeling and actually let it all escape! I mean, they did give me 3 contrast drinks beforehand.  Once it was over, I was totally dry and it was all an illusion!! I told him he needed to reword that to where he tells the patient 'you will feel like you totally wet yourself'! Next was the bone scan and that was actually relaxing, especially since she covered me with a warmed blanket......the folks at Moffitt have treated me like royalty.

Although my oncologist was booked on Christmas Eve she fit me in the schedule and I'm so glad she did. Having cancer is probably the worst Christmas present I ever got but finding out that my scans were clear, liver cyst is benign,  and I'm now on the schedule for treatment is more than a gift. I am still waiting on endometrial biopsy results but I am confident that is all going to be fine as well. My oncologist is Dr. Ishmel-Kahn and she seems great along with my nurse, Sandy. We had quite a few laughs during the appointment and mainly because my husband doesn't know how to behave! They were going over all the side effects I will or may get and Dave told them that he will just tell me to "rub some dirt on it".  This is a token phrase of his and they thought it was funny. Actually when we got to the Breast Center they gave us a light-up pager like they use at restaurants and he asked them "could we get a booth?'.  I can't take him ANYWHERE!

Back to the office visit......my nurse, Sandy, was going over the procedure to insert my port. She brought one in to show us (see picture):

Now this isn't the exact one they are putting in me but Dave couldn't get over the pin-size hole in the catheter. Immediately had took it apart (because he takes EVERYTHING apart!!!) and Sandy asked him "did you break my port?". He continued to tell us that this hole bothered him so he busted out his pocket knife and repaired it! He was so antsy about it not being right the nurse told him he can fix it so he did. Seriously, I can't take him anywhere and expect him to behave himself!

My doctor and nurse both went over all the side effects that will or may happen including hair loss (this is a definite), weight gain (this really sucks but happens from the steroids), more fatigue, feeling like crap, heart issues, mouth sores, etc. Then they tell me not to eat uncooked foods, that means NO SUSHI?!! Not happy about that at all.  Then the port has to go on my right side....but that's my shooting arm! So, I'll have to get out and shoot some sporting clays over the next week.....or learn how to shoot lefty. On the upside, they have drugs for the nausea from chemo so hopefully that won't be an issue.

I start chemo on Jan 14th and will go every 2 weeks for treatment.  The first 4 treatments they call "AC" for Adriamycin and Cylclophosphamide.  Then the last for treatments it is just Taxol.....and my hair should start to grow back at this point too!  To keep my immune system from dumping on me I will also take shots of Neulasta.  I'll try and do this myself to save me a trip to Moffitt, or maybe let Dave do it if I'm real courageous!

I think for the most part my attitude towards this venture has been positive.  I do have my moments and I think every cancer patient deserves to have a breakdown here and there. It came to my mind while getting ready this morning that this is natures way of "pulling my life card". Luckily we now have advanced medicine and this can be treated and cured. But there is still that reality that things could go wrong and I find that a bit scary. No matter how much they tell me things will be ok, knowing that I have Stage IIA Triple Negative Breast Cancer just puts life into a different perspective.

But it is Christmas and I'm looking forward making a rib roast and hanging out with family, friends, and my dogs. This is the first year that I didn't even buy one Christmas present, I feel like a jerk! I thought everyone agreed to no presents this year and now I'm finding out there are some presents and I'm the only one that followed the rule!  Anyway, here is my favorite Christmas picture of Hunter when we spent Christmas at our cabin in Ohio (2011). I swear it could make a hallmark card but I'll just keep him to myself.

I appreciate you reading my story and I hope this spreads the right message to everyone out there to share. I already know of 3 friends that scheduled mammograms after learning about my diagnosis and that was a great feeling to me, so my efforts are working!

Merry Christmas!